Well, if that’s not the understatement of the year, I don’t know what is. So I went to visit my sick aunt this past weekend, to sort of pay my last respects, and I wasn’t really prepared. My mom tried to tell me how bad she was, but still you can’t prepare yourself for that if you’ve never seen it before. My aunt has always been a small lady, I think she’s about 5′ 2” and has probably never weighed more than 110 lbs. I’d be surprised if she weighs 70 lbs now. As my uncle described it, she’s slowly being eaten away from the inside. She has no appetite and she’s drinking about 8 oz of fluid a day, max, including water and Ensure, which is where she’s getting most of her nutrients. She’s taking about 150 mg of morphine orally and she’s still awake and aware of what’s going on around her. We watched a lot of the travel channel and some HGTV. I ran some errands for my uncle and did what little I could to feel helpful. I can’t say I’m “happy” I went, but I do know it was my last opportunity to see her and give her my love. And I know she appreciated it and could understand what was going on.

As awful as it is, there are some good things that come out of times like this. Of course, family comes together to help each other out, and you get to see people you might not otherwise have seen. In this case, my aunt and her sister, who haven’t spoken in 10 years, apparently made things right 2 weeks ago, which is a huge weight off her shoulders. Neither of them would talk about the feud or whatever it was that kept them from speaking, and no one else really knows, but it was quite obvious something was very wrong. Anyway, the reconciliation would not have been possible without this situation, which is sad, but is also the truth. If nothing else, it makes it a little easier when its all said and done.

I wish there was something really uplifting I could say, but its hard in a time like this. I am inspired by my aunt’s joyful spirit and her strength to fight as long as she could, but also by her strength to know when its time to let go.