I found out yesterday that the one member of my extended family who’d already RSVPed is not going to be able to come to the wedding. For legitimate reasons, but still a bit disappointing. I didn’t think I would mind if none of my relatives came, but now, when I think about it, I’m kinda upset. This is the most important day of my life and it’s supposed to be the day when family comes together to celebrate. Just thinking about the Egan family portrait makes me a bit sad. It will just be me, my mom and my brother. Of course, they are the most important members of my family, but its just unsettling that none of my other relatives consider this a reason to miss a day of work or buy a plane ticket. My only consulation is knowing that soon I will have a bigger family than I’ve ever had. I haven’t had any grandparents since I was 19, so its cool to think of Jason’s grandparents as soon-to-be-relatives.

But anyway, I am very grateful that so many of our friends can attend and I know it will still be an incredible day.

Whoo hoo, one night without freaky wedding dreams! Or, at least none that I can remember!

So Jason left for Portland, Oregon yesterday, which means I’m left to fend for myself for a few days. I think its good to have time apart, but it doesn’t take long for me to miss him. Especially when it comes to sleeping…I find it very hard to have a good night’s sleep when he’s not there. Of course, it doesn’t help that I’ve invited Clem and Dex to sleep with me and they aren’t the soundest of sleepers either. Plus, both of them are on the look out for “dad”, so every noise is potentially Jason coming home.

The point of this is that I had another crazy wedding dream. In this one, we were at a location where weddings happen one after the other all throughout the day. I was freaking out because I hadn’t met with my florist to finalize the flowers, I hadn’t given our officiant the script for the ceremony and I hadn’t even met up with my wedding coordinator till like an hour before the wedding. The ceremony before ours was running late and by the end of it, the officiant said he couldn’t stay and that he could come back the next morning. Since most people either live in Nashville or they were there for the whole weekend, we decided it would be okay to do the wedding the next morning, but then we didn’t have the location reserved. Anyway, it was a mess.

I sure hope not, considering the crazy dreams I’ve been having lately. I keep dreaming the ceremony is all messed up or the planning was all wrong, when I have no reason to worry at all. I’ve heard I shouldn’t do wedding stuff right before bed cause that can prompt the dreams, but its pretty much on my mind non-stop nowadays! Anyway, I’ll enjoy the day when it gets here, but I think I’ll be a little relieved when it is all over.

So Jason’s got me hooked on this comic/graphic novel called “Usagi Yojimbo”. Its about this master-less samurai rabbit named Usagi who roams around the hillsides, running into sundry and, almost always dangerous, circumstances. He fights the bad guys, protects the good, helpless guys, and longs for his lost love. And all the characters are animals, but its still very serious and life-like. Anyway, I’ve purchase a few of the books and have a few of the smaller comics. The books are by far my favorite…I guess cause I feel like I’m getting a lot more out of them. Now that the wedding invitations are done, they keep me busy.

I started a post called “Outta Gas” a few posts down and really had the intention of telling a great story. Apparently the title really was true cause I was too tired to tell the story. So here it goes:

A few weeks ago, Jason and I were bringing home chairs from Lowes in Cool Springs to make a nice addition to the lovely gazebo we had purchased the weekend before. We were in the truck, which is the only way we’d be able to get these huge boxes home, but it was raining so we were trying to get home quickly. Just as we got on the interstate, I felt the steering wheel kinda lock up and the gas pedal no longer accepted my pressing foot. We had, apparently, run out of gas and the gauge was just barely on the E. What I was not aware of at the time is that when the gauge gets anywhere near E, its time to fill up. In our other cars, when the light comes on, we still have about 25 miles we can go before we really need gas. Not so for the truck.

I had never run out of gas before! Never even been in a car that had run out of gas. So I was a little nervous at first. Luckily we weren’t that far from the exit, about a 5 minute walk, then another few minutes to the gas station. The best, though, was that Jason was so cool about the whole thing. For some reason, I thought this was one of those things that really makes people mad and I guess I expected Jason to get mad, even though he rarely does. So, anyway, it was a delightful turn that we were able to make this, what could’ve been, a crappy situation, into a nice, dark, rainy walk along the highway.

It was one of those moments that makes me really really happy I am marrying this man. I get a sense of peace when I think about our life together and that is almost enough to calm my nerves before the wedding. Generally, Jason is not the type to baby me and make me feel like I can’t take care of the situation, but in this case, he knew to step in and take control, cause he could see I was a little freaked out. Just knowing that he can sense that about me and that he knew what to do to fix it, makes me happier than I can express. I fall more in love with him everyday.

You know its been too long when you can’t even remember where to go to update your blog. Unfortunately, I’m not going to spend a good deal of time updating my blog right now, but I will add more later, I promise. Things with the wedding are coming along nicely, every thing is falling into place. I sent out the invites today! Very exciting. I have a lot of activities lined up between now and September, so I think I’ll be kept busy!! Well, I just wanted to post so you know I’m alive and well. I will update more later!